Life

Life, There is much of it and it is a constant state, with no seeming beginning or end in sight. Life, my life is full now of different things.
I am going to give you a low down of this life of mine in five paragraphs.

This week I began a new prayer. The Zimbabwean women at my Church is part of this group called the "Catholic Charismatic renewal". They sing, pray together, read the Bible and explicate it, which is not done at the mass, a lay person preaching after reading the Bible. Today in the group, we sang songs, some of the songs in the book are ones I know from the US evangelical groups, including "Here I am to Worship". These songs are part and parcel of the internation christian evangelical movement, where personal relationship with the divine and a charasmatic approach, with song dance and testimony in large and small group settings allow people to find solace from the busy modern world and where they can experience the transformation in their lives. So this Charasmatic renewal is the Catholic Churches way of embracing this trend in Christianity.
There is a prayer called the Chaplet of Divine Mercy. Whenever you see a picture of a white Jesus (he is almost always white) with rays comming out of his heart, like in two different directions, ray of white and pink, that is the picture of Jesus found on the booklet and website for the Chaplet of the Divine Mercy. Revealled to Sister Faustina Koswolka in 1935-37, this is a prayer the Saviour, Jesus himself, meaning God told to the sister to recite. It is recited for mercy on the whole world and accompanies the novena before easter (prayer for nine days). When you listen to it, it moves you. When I first heard, they were praying it, "For the sake of his sorrowfull passion" the one lady uttered clutching her rosary bead, before the others answered, "Have mercy on us and on the whole world". So it goes "For the sake of his sorrowfull passion, have mercy on us and the whole world", ten times, before reaching the large bead the "Our father" bead of the rosary, where we pray "O Eternal father, I offer up the body, blood, soul and divinity of your dearly beloved son Jesus Christ, in atonement for our sins and those of the whole world".
Whole world, brough to the heart of Jesus. Universal Church, Catholic Church, where all people are brought to salvation through prayer. Yes, we as agents can ask God to have mercy on us, and though the passsion has already happened and we are already saved, the prayer implies we should remind God of this, so He can have mercy on us. It is really moving, but strange, because these are supposedly Christ's own words he told to the Sain Faustina.
The Catholic Church seems to frequently dialogues with the Lord, since even every month, on the 25th The Virgin gives a message to the world, but is on her own accord, or is she the messenger of the Lord?

I pray the Chaplet, while doing Yoga in my room, and really it is soo strong, I feel the physicality in my bones and flesh. Now I also did in the Highlands Church on Friday, just before youth group and told my fellow Youth member, Cynthia, who leads the fellowship, about the Chaplet. I told my colleagues about the Chaplet, including a man Mr Sibanda that I correctly guessed was Catholic. Was there a Catholic look to him? I don't know, maybe.
I though, may feel overburdened by it at times, since it is sorrowfull, yet peacefull. I encourage you, reader to pray the Chaplet and see how it works for you. Google it.

At Highlands on Friday, they had this thing that they asked us to do. It was to answer a few questions: Who are you? What is your purpose (i.e. why are you alive?), How do you measure your potential and why do you think this about yourself?
These were very tough questions, and I find myself sometimes at a loss to answer them. I know I have purpose, but there are so many things I am doing. Right now I decided to go for the masters next year, a masters in public health. I can do it, the money is there, I have worked for it. I can apply for research grants, it seems so great. Then there is dance, I have to keep it alive, because is there a life without the dance? Though I want to do all this with intent, not for the sake of doing it but, because I need to.

I want to write an article on the role of traditional medicines as potential ant-retrovirals and the Namibian peoples reliance on them today. I want to understand how Namibia too, like Brazil many year ago in latter part of the 90s, is undergoing a transformation, where HIV is now a chronic illness and pharmaceutical governance, whereby the government makes the decision to provide ARV and must ways of sustaining it, is at play. I met a girl today wearing an orange shirt with the words "Colby Cares". She was from Colby, I found out and I introduced myself as a Princeton alumn, the word "wow" quickly came from her mouth and that of her two friends. They are on an internship here in Namibia, study abroad ish, with courses. One of the girls works with the pharmaceutical part of the health ministry. I can now find out about ARV and all that jazz.

I am so tired, so much so that I am struggling to put together a coherent paragraph. I went to the park today and met up with a friend named Eugene I met years ago at the University of Namiba, back when I was still in high school and was doing my project in the "in vitro relaitonship between S. thermophilus and E.coli". This is the way I introduced Eugene, in this context to a guy who passed me and Eugene in the park , who I did not know, but his wife was wearing the UWC, Waterford Kamhlabla shirt. His name is Harry, he graduate in 1998 and he and his wife decided to start their lives here. She is Namibian. I said I want to start mobilizing the UWC kids here, the graduates.
I also want to mobilize the youth at the Catholic Church, to get them to come volunteer with me at the Catholic AIDS Action cresh, for young children.
I will involve my youth group at the Highlands Church as well.
This youth social service thing is my current project, the UWC one will come later.

So many things that I want to do.
So here are my priorities now again:
1) Get the application form to the University of Namibia in on time. Check for the transcript in the mail
2) Study for GRE really well.
3) Read about the molecular epidemiology of Malaria. Email a researcher at the University of Namibia, UNAM, about it and see if you can join his team, if it interests you
4) Mobilize the Youth for Catholic Aids action
5) write the article about ARV and traditional medicines in Namibia (late Oct)
6) Dance, why at the bottom of my list? You don't belong here, because you are an everpresent part of my life. Dance review I plan to write you tomorrow.

It is not easy. At all. Especially this Catholic AIDS ACTION thing. I have to figure out how we as a youth will get there, on the other side of town. Who will transport us? How will cover the cost of petrol? All these questions, can be answered. First let me get volunteers, which in itself is a mission. A cake sale will cover the petroL.
Tomorrow I am going to the Cathedral at 2pm, there I will listen to a gospel show by Voz Divina, the Angolan catholic group and will attend the opening of the Saint Mary's Youth Leauge, SMYL organization, for whom the idea of volunteering popped up some months ago. I will go. It will be great. But now it kind of feels I am not necessarily going to worship, but I am going for another reason. Is God just a reason for me to volunteer and do good things, things that make me feel good regardless if I were Christian or not?